This is part of a series called “Devotionals.”
“Be still and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46:10)
I’m wondering if God called me out of employment to teach me…nothingness.
At least, from a worldly sense.
Today’s “TGIF” Marketplace Leaders devotional gives us a heads up that there will be times in our walk with God where he will place us in a state of isolation and waiting. Where our past experiences are of no value, and there are no new opportunities to activate us and keep us busy. A situation in which expected resources or activities are removed and there is nothing I can do to change them.
It’s a super uncomfortable feeling for me. From age 15 until now, I’ve built a ridiculous work ethic. In high school I had full-time classes and homework during the weekdays and a full-time work shift on Saturdays and Sundays. In college I had work from 9a to 5p and classes from 7p to 9p every weekday, with homework to fill in the gaps. And up until I submitted my letter of resignation at Fransmart, I was working full-time at the company and also developing The Halal Guys restaurant chain with my partners in Southern California.
Grinding was just part of my DNA for the last 20 years.
I have to laugh, because while I am currently unemployed from the standpoint of having a W2 paycheck, I’m actually still doing quite a bit of work: I’m still growing The Halal Guys; I’m still working with Fransmart as an independent developer; I started a nonprofit organization; and I’m consulting and managing projects here and there.
I guess I’m just feeling weird about not having a “job” job, and I’m thinking that maybe God is telling me that what I have is enough to focus on. I should probably heed this nudge now and be thankful for what I’ve got, or He may play the “tough love” parent card and continue taking more away from me until I realize that He is more than enough and that I just need to depend on Him and not the tangible, temporary provisions of the world that I am guilty of leaning on.
An image that comes to mind is the performance of a full computer hard drive, versus one that has less in storage. The latter doesn’t wear out the hardware; what currently is in the system operates faster and more optimally; and there is less crashing.
Lord – help me be comfortable with this uncomfortableness; help me be stronger than the natural inclination to add more projects; help me be thankful for what I already have, because what You’ve given me is enough; help me be present, still, and know that You really are God.